DailyJim: How do you imagine I might be feeling right now?

Hello everyone welcome to another daily gym this is the second one for today because i missed monday so it's technically august 28th 2024 but i'm doing this for tuesday august 27th 2024, and right now i want to talk about a question that came up in conversation earlier um if we were to ask somebody else how do you imagine i might be feeling right now Now, yeah, another variation of this is that my friend came up with, and maybe this will be the actual title, is how do you imagine I might be feeling about myself? Perhaps that can be the full title. Yeah, how do you imagine I might be feeling about myself? self.

I think it's a more specific version of how do you imagine I might be feeling right now, which is a question I'm thinking to start asking, thinking to start to ask more people these days, because I think sometimes we can get stuck in paying attention to only how we're feeling, and frankly, sometimes not even be very good at it. But in fights, we often seem to overlook how how the other person might be feeling. So instead of me telling somebody how I'm feeling, yes, maybe I can tell them I'm angry or confused. I think prompting them with, how do you imagine I might be feeling right now? Can get them to at least start to think about it. And I think the next version of, how do you imagine I might be feeling about myself?

The more specific version can really.

Help people reflect on one's own self-reflection or maybe even self-attack and self-judgment and self-shame.

Because I don't know if you ask that question, how do you imagine I might be feeling about myself? I don't know how many people are going to say, I think you feel proud, I think you feel strong, I think you feel... Maybe but maybe it'll be like maybe you feel ashamed or maybe you feel anxious and worried and embarrassed i don't know i don't really know the answer i'm curious to play with it more and some part of me said don't talk about it yet think about it more yeah experiment with it more but no sometimes i think it's okay to share some of these early stage experiments with people and hear their results if they want to share um yeah i think we can often get so trapped in our own experience and even hesitant to answer that question i asked it to a girl once how do you imagine i might be feeling right now how do you imagine i might be feeling when i think about this. Topic hey i don't want to know how you're feeling okay i don't want to imagine how you're feeling okay hmm what i think she even said i don't want to imagine how you're feeling why don't you just tell me so because it's different if i tell you how i'm feeling yeah i can tell you but it's not the same as if you're imagining because if you're imagining it you have to start to process and analyze and observe and piece things together and make guesses and making guesses can lead to lots Lots of uncertainty, actually, but the uncertainty is the point. The uncertainty is the idea of not trying to get it perfectly correct, but just to imagine, and to try to put oneself, as we would say, into their shoes, but really into their heart and into their mind to see what the experience might be like.

So, yeah, I don't know how often has something happened in your life where somebody has said to you, how do you imagine I might be feeling right now? Or what do you think I'm feeling right now? Or what's your best guess at what's happening in my life right now? Or what type of internal conflict do you think I have?

I don't know. I just think it can be really magical when we pause and imagine how other people might be feeling. I've done a lot of different drills and exercises on this, and it can really help.

Again, it's not about being 100% accurate. It's more about just trying to contemplate the humanity of another human being.

And instead of waiting for them to share it, it's almost a proactive approach to humanizing someone else and to not just humanize them in a charitable way, but to humanize them in a very practical way and to get closer in understanding what their needs and their wants might be and their feelings and their thoughts and their behaviors and their past and their future and their relationships and so many other contexts. So, yeah, I just hope that maybe you take that question to heart. And I'll end with it by asking how do you imagine I might be feeling right now?

Haya. Haya, sorry. Haya is a Swahili expression for like, okay, so, ayabas. Like, okay, and then, eh, okay. I won't tell you. I'm tired. So I wonder if you imagine I was tired. But yeah, I will talk to you all tomorrow. Bye. Thank you.